first love nearly dies

i fell in love for the first time when i was 15 years old. i first saw him walking to school along the same path that my friends and i walked every day. he caught my eye because he was so tall and looked really cool in his aviator sunglasses. the fact that he wore bell bottom carpenter pants did little to distract me from the fact this guy was at least 6 inches taller than me. you can always take a guy shopping and fix the wardrobe, but little can remedy a too-short guy when you tower above him. we did the silly thing-stealing glances at each other as we walked in the same direction on opposite sides of the street and turning quickly away when the other caught us looking. after a few weeks we would say hi to each other and i would giggle and blush with my friends. Then I met a new girl at school, she hung out with us at lunch and we were becoming friends when i found out she was the little sister of mr. tall guy with sunglasses. she introduced us and that was it. i was just shy of my 15th birthday and he was almost 17 and we were in love. we were together on an off for 5 years. we went to his homecoming and senior prom-he was my first official date when i turned 16. my first kiss. i cant speak for mr. tgws(i could and i think i would be right,but i wont.), but i have to say i loved him. not silly, 1st time puppy love. i LOVED him. heres our song. 20+ years later, looking back with my experienced, more mature eyes, i loved him. our break up was ugly. it was his fault, but his drug haze prevented him from seeing that clearly. he did horrible things-one of the most notorious was being photographed snorting cocaine off a framed picture he had of me. nice, eh? i wanted to be married in the temple and have babies. this guy wasnt going there with me, so i broke up with him. married mr soldier of fortune(more on him later) about a year later and never spoke to mr tgws again. fast forward about 20 years and he emails me out of the blue. we catch up and are able to actually talk to each other without attempting homocide. it was fun and i think we both considered the possibility of lighting the old flame, but we were worlds apart. me in the rs presidency planning super saturday and him showing off his devil clown tattoos and waist length black hair, now streaked with grey. we settled into emailing every few months and maybe talking 2 or 3 times a year, but then i got an email from his little brother telling me that mr tgws was rushed to the hospital and was in a coma! apparently he was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and did nothing as far as diet and medication. his mother found him non responsive and called 911. he could have died. if she hadnt found him, he would have died. it is the strangest thing when the boy you loved first is thrown into this kind of crises. its like he is still the strong, handsome, athletic boy-frozen in my mind as he was. now he is attached to a dialysis machine and hoping that his body will heal so he can live some semblence of a normal life.