it runs in my family in varying degrees. mine is what my therapist refers to as "situational" depression. i am good until the shit really hits the fan and then i crash into a severe depression after a long hard fight.
i have crashed. there have been a few of you that have commented privately(you were very sweet and i wasnt offended in the slightest, just a little embarrassed)that i should seek professional help. i love professional help! i am all for it and have used it in the past. just not sure if i am up for it right now. therapy is hard work and the doctor that i trust the most is no longer in practice. breaking in a new doctor would be difficult. which,is of course, the depression talking. depression takes away all that makes me me and paints me grey.
bottom line-i have been here before and i know my way back. it just sucks.