Tuesday, February 24, 2009

thats right NO SEX

i have been divorced for many,many years. there have been a few times that i considered wavering on my comittment to keeping the law a chastity, but ended up sticking it out. i am amazed by people in the church who find this such an amazing feat. am i some shrivled up prude who never cared about sex in the first place? no. not just no, HELL NO. that is an aspect of my marriage that i truly enjoyed. one of the few things we managed to do well, but as we all know, sex cannot save a marriage when all else is lacking. might drag it out a little...i digress. i understood when my non member friends thought i was crazy for not having sex. common worldy views is that you cannot built a successful relationship without having sex and making sure you are compatible in bed(or wherever else you might get your groove on).but when members. temple recommend holders(in some cases)that questioned my comittment to this important doctorine. threw me right back to high school. slapping boys hands away. many members choose to have sex outside marriage. some have good reasons. maybe their wives were fridgid prudes and they want to make sure it doesnt happen again. maybe they are just lazy and horney and doing what the "natural man" would do. i dont know and i dont judge, but i wish they wouldnt judge me. tell me i am immature and running away from forming a grown up adult relationship. i totally disagree. it is a fine line to walk. to ask the right questions and prayerfully consider what you discover and trust that if anything comes up(or doesnt, whatever the case may be)that you can work it out. i guess for some, thats too big of a risk. to me, running fast and loose with that stuff and the spiritual consequences is too big a risk. mr ex man and i negotiated all of that so well. i knew that our life in that area would be fulfilling and exciting. we spoke openly,but within righteous boundaries. no cyber or phone sex for us. plenty of flirting and honest communication about what we both wanted. at the time, it all seemed really good. very compatitable. instead of being worried or freaked out i was looking forward to the time when we would be engaging in a righteous sex life. i truly believe that not only is that possible, its what we all should be shooting for. what could be better?

No comments:

Post a Comment