Tuesday, March 8, 2011

a virtuous woman?

is this even important to men anymore? old cliches like "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" or "you cant buy a car without kicking the tires and looking under the hood." keep running through my head.
do men care? do they find it a good thing that a woman has "saved" herself for marriage or has maintained virtue after a divorce or are the suspicious of someone who has gone without sex for more than a short time?


  1. I know your comment is written from a place of great pain or you wouldn't even be writing it. OF COURSE it's important to the right kind of man. You are facing the challenge of doing what's right when doing what's wrong would feel so much better. IN THE MOMENT, of course.

    Doing what's right may only feel better than giving in when you're standing at the bar with the Savior and looking back over the choices you've made.

    You can do this, even though it's hard. Try to keep your perspective, I believe it's worth it.

    Hugs, Sus

  2. There have always been men who try to get as much as they can from a woman and there have always been men who respect women and want to have a wife who has complete chastity and fidelity. Its YOU who gets to decide what kind of man you want.

  3. There is an amazing article that was published today on www.meridianmagazine.com (online LDS mag) by Erin Ann McBride "How the Sexual Revolution Killed the Common Date". She hit the nail right on the head...........

  4. i am going to check that article out-thanks for the heads up.
    i know what kind of man i want and i think i have found him a couple of times, but despite herculean efforts, i get fooled every time. i am in a little bit of a dark place right now, sorry to be such a drag.

  5. why arent the guys weighing in on this? i suspect that even lds guys dont care as much as they let on. not that it will change my pov, just saying.

  6. It's funny you wrote this. I was thinking after I commented on your post from last night how (at least here in Utah) guys pretty much over-emphasize a girls "purity". As in, I think it's pretty rare for a guy who has never been married or had sex to be interested in a girl who has been married previously. After conversations with various guys I know I've found the consensus is that Utah Mormon guys find it VERY important to be their wife's "first".

    I'd even say that in the culture here it is more socially acceptable(though still considered a bad thing) for a guy to "slip up" than for girls.

  7. i remember msof getting a big ego boost from being my first. he, of course, was very experienced. it didnt bother me, but the double standard is staggering. he isnt lds, but i dont think its an uncommon thing.