where the hell have i been?

i dont know if i have ever gone a week without posting. not much has been going on, but it seems like so much and its wearing me out!

mr great white north is back to being a consistent presence and he is making plans to come and see me. WHATEVER. i told him to make the definite plans and get back to me. turns out he was in my town a few months back and didnt even call me. yes. thats right. why am i even considering seeing him? 1. i am bored. 2. if he actually follows through, it will be a miracle, so there is very little risk involved.

none of you know me, yet i am concerned about your judgment on this topic. i am aware that it looks idiotic. i would advise anyone who had told me this story to tell him to JUMP OFF A CLIFF. i dont think he is THE ONE, but if he actually does make it back here, whats the harm in a date?

mr jack mormon has been texting me. i have pretty much ignored him, but recently i told him that i wasnt intentionally ignoring him(true)that i just wasnt around when he sent the messages.

which leads me to my next item of business. i have been on a a flirt fest. i was going to say i was acting all slutty, but i guess thats not really factual. i am usually monogamous, even in my flirting, but not now. oh no. i am currently flirting like crazy with 4 guys. or is it 5? lets just say 4. makes me feel a little less slutty. i am not a tease. i dont flirt by telling a guy all the wild sexual things i will do to him, then cry chastity and not follow through. i flirt with the basics, like smiles, and laughing at his jokes or playfully slap his arm. most of this has been via modern technology, so...i have been flirting with words. no web cam or anything like that. my words have been super flirty, but not crossing the line. toeing the line, but not crossing it.

so why is it bugging me? is it because i am breaking with my normal monogamy? i have no formal agreement with anyone. no dtr's in my recent past. doubt there are any in my near future either. maybe i am just being a sissy.

officially on a dating site. its been kind of slow, but picking up. both mr ex man and mr jack mormon have looked at my profile. i made a snide remark to mr jack mormon, but said nothing to mr ex man.

no dates yet, but definitely some interest. i will see how it goes. for at least 6 months since i took advantage of the super summer sale.

is that as pathetic as it sounds?