Tuesday, September 15, 2009
i am going to freakin loose my mind!
a good friend of mine(non member)was telling me about a woman she works with(member)whose husband emptied their bank account to get a flight out of town so he could go stay with his mommy. apparently he did not appreciate when she laid down the law forbidding pornography in their home and let him know she would no longer allow his rages towards her or their 4 children. what the hell is going on?!?! ok, i know whats going on. these are the last days and the advesary is working overtime, but COME ON. i am worn out from hearing these stories. they used to be rare and even then you were never sure if they were true(mormon urban myth),but now it seems like they are all true. when my brother was called into the bishopric of a newly formed ward he was told that when submitting names for callings to not ask questions if a name was rejected because there were eighteen elders being counseled for pornography addictions and working through the repentance process. that is just one ward and only the ones who were willing to admit and come forward regarding the issue. how many more are too ashamed or dont think its a problem? i have heard a lot of whining about the "natural man", how men are visual creatures, and once they have seen a naked woman, they simply cannot be held responsible for their actions. i cannot remember the last time i heard one of these stories where the man stood up and just claimed the fact he was acting selfishly and irresponsibly, begged for his wife's forgiveness and got down to the business of repenting and repairing his relationships. statistics show that men are not the only ones addicted to porn. i dont have any stories or personal knowledge of a woman being involved and destroying her family with pornography, but have personal knowledge of 2 women who up and left their husbands and their children. yep, the kids too. that stuns me more than the porn epidemic. i just mention it because i know that the crazy divorce rate does not fall at the feet of men only. women can be big jerks too.
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Totally. You're so much better than everyone else!
ReplyDeleteif anon was joking: totally! its a wonder they arent lined up around the block to be my 2nd husband. chicks like me are in short supply.
ReplyDeleteif anon was serious: never have and never will think i am better than anyone else. we all spend our time in the relationship trenches, just think this porn thing has gotten so out of control. it used to be the rare lds guy who was involved, now it seems that its the rare lds guy who isnt. its scary and depressing. seems like its more addictive than meth and equally as gross.
You are dead on! Terrible times singlemormonchick, terrible times.
ReplyDeleteSexual addictions are more wide-spread and the recovery is harder than those of drugs and alcohol. The recovery world is only beginning to address it, but it's about where alcoholism was fifty years ago -- lots of people want to say that it's not an addiction, it's just a lack of self-control or character. Everybody has everything they need to be a full-blown addict without spending a penny or involving anybody else -- and there are certainly things that can be done with it that involve spending pennies and involving other people.
ReplyDeleteAddressing it from a Mormon perspective is ldsr.org, and local areas may have the Pornography Addiction Support Groups as part of the Addiction Recovery Program run through LDSFS. There is also Heart-t-Heart for general LDS 12 Step recovery, or groups like Sexaholics Anonymous, Sex and Love Anonymous and Sex Addicts Anonymous that have more experience with SA, but not LDS-oriented.
SA is not strictly about men but, as with alcoholism 50 years ago, there remains a huge amount of shame around the idea of female addicts.