Wednesday, July 21, 2010

2 books

i just finished "marry him ---> the case for settling for mr good enough and i am trying to get through "a love alchemists notebook". ms gottlieb(marry him) gives a lot of good information about dating, marriage, and divorce, but there is no happy ending. she says she has learned a lot, but hasnt gotten married and isnt even dating much. ms shepherd(love alchemist) had a very happy ending. she found the love of her life and got married.
gottlieb hired a dating coach who brought her some dismal numbers about the men available to her. something like 1% of an already small percentage of the male population who are interested in dating a woman in her 40's, while shepherd says that the scarcity we speak of is a myth. there is enough love to go around for everyone. you just have to use her magic secrets to "draw" the love of your life to you. its a tough read. i really dont know if i will make it through it. she is a astrologist, so a lot of her principles are based on knowing when your love sign is in the right house when mars is in retrograde or something like that. i really dont have the patience for that crap.
i am happy to say that i didnt fall into many of the traps that "marry him" talks about, but i am a little embarrassed to say that i have fallen into the trap of wanting the "perfect" romantic love story. in sex in the city, charlotte wanted the ny times write up in the wedding section. i want the good story to tell when my (imaginary) husband and i give a talk in sacrament meeting. gottlieb tells many stories of how women were holding out for the perfect story only to pass up the right guy because he didnt meet every lofty expectation. gottlieb herself tells of 2 guys she passed up and regrets it terribly.
overall, the book was a little depressing. her spin on the statistics are pretty dim for a girl like me, but it was a good read and there was some good information towards the end about happiness in marriage.
i will let you know about the love alchemist,if i make it through.


  1. Haha, personally I like having the good story. I enjoy, when people ask how Hannah and I met, to tell them how she was friends with my high school girlfriend.

  2. yeah, but hey! you are still in your 20's, the time is NOW to alter your expectations and how you date and land a man now. each passing year makes it more impossible until you hit your 40's. then forget it. according to marry him,anyway.

  3. woasm- that is a good story. its sure to get a few laughs from the congregation.

  4. I always dreamed about having the great story. But in the end, every story that works out is a great story. Whether it's "We met online after 6 months of messaging using eHarmony" or "He was the helicopter pilot that was driving me to my wedding with another person and as soon as I met him, I knew I was marrying the wrong person." It seems like there are a lot of other things you can mess around in your life with to get the perfect story than your love life.